Lately I have been reflecting a lot on life and death. It
seems like with every year of life, the certainty of both life and death become
more real. With every year, life becomes more fragile. As a child you can
understand life and death on a tangible level; babies are born and now they’re
here and people die and now they’re gone, but the reality, the finality, is not
understood. Eric and I have been relatively lucky with having healthy families
and friends. We haven’t had to experience much death. But as we are getting
older, people we are close to are beginning to get sick but on the other end
more friends and family are having babies. I am beginning to really
understand that from here out, death will become more prevalent. This part of
life is kind of sad; thinking about what the world loses. Well, if we’re being
serious it’s sad because of what I am losing. I guess it is better not to think
of it as an end and also to focus on what the world and I are gaining with new
life. With us about to start a family, I have been thinking about all of these
things but especially evaluating how I have lived.
Reflecting on the last two years of my life feels like
forever and no time at all. It was such a challenge that at the beginning, I
wasn’t sure if I could make it. I take that back. I knew I could make it, but I
wasn’t sure if I wanted to. I remember our first months in site being so
difficult. I had sticky notes on our wall with the months left of our service.
With every month that passed I took down another note. There was something
about completing another month that gave me a sense of accomplishment. It was
as if 2 years seemed like too much to handle, but months went by fast enough
for it not to feel like forever but also not too fast to be insignificant.
But along the way something changed. I soon found myself
counting the months I had left to travel and see the country. I remember
planning out our trips with Eric and thinking, “There’s not enough time.” This
was when I had finally adjusted to life in Ecuador. Even then, there were still
plenty of challenges, but by this time I had found a way to be comfortable
living here. Now that I am looking back I am sort of amazed at all we have done.
Throughout the two years it often felt like we were so bored and we never had
anything to do but I realize now that just isn’t true.
Recently I was watching Kevin Spacey give an acceptance
speech for some award he won. He talked about how he would never understand why
he was so fortunate in life. Though at the time I felt myself comparing my
achievements to his and thinking about how fortunate he was, I didn’t really begin to think about how fortunate I am. I am incredibly lucky and I like
Kevin Spacey, won’t ever begin to understand why. I am so happy that Eric and I
have been able to have this experience together and I can’t wait to see what
the next adventure has in store.
With all of this reflecting on the past two years, I present to you a short video that sums up how we lived in Ecuador.
